More Uncertainty

The last week has been frustrating and anticlimactic. My OBGYN still believes I had another pregnancy and miscarriage...but can't be absolutely certain. My RE thinks it's more likely I was passing tissue/blood from the previous miscarriage.....but doesn't know. Basically, my RE thinks my OBGYN missed something on the ultrasound I had after the last miscarriage. But my OBGYN is confident in what she saw. Maybe I just want to believe I got pregnant again, but I believe I got pregnant again. Why? Two reasons - 1. There was a lot of blood/tissue in this recent round...I feel like my OBGYN would have to have been blind to have missed it. 2. I'm the only one that went through it and I don't know what else would cause that much pain and bleeding. In any case, I'll never know for sure. Annoying.

And, neither Dr. seems to think it really makes a difference anyway. So, I've just gone through more physical and mental hell and nobody really cares. Sweet.

Anyway, all I can hope for is that my body gets back on track ASAP. I had an ultrasound today at my RE's office and he said my ovaries are confused......hopefully, my hormones will start working regularly soon.

On a more happy note, my hubby and I celebrated our 4th anniversary this past weekend. We flew to Seattle and had a wonderful time. We did some sightseeing, ate a lot, drank a lot and relaxed a lot too. He planned the weekend so all I had to do was show up! Oh - and we also each ran 20 miles - well I ran/walked. I am still planning to do the NYC marathon on 11/1. Yes - maybe a dumb move for my reproductive system. I certainly wouldn't have been training had I known what was potentially going on last month. In any case, the marathon gives me something to look forward to. Training is a release for me. Completing it will feel good - something I can do as compared to all my IF "failures". And, hopefully when I finish, my body will be ready to make this baby thing happen!!!