This IUI cycle is going better than the last one but, per my last post, I just can't muster up much hope. We went in on CD12, and my lining was looking quite thin at 5mm. I was concerned. But, when we did the IUI procedure on CD15 my lining was 8mm. Better. And, DH's motile sperm count was much better than last month (23mm vs. 9mm). I had two lovely follicles in there. The Dr. (and not the mean one I had last month!) sounded optimistic and for a moment I felt it too. But, then I thought about how many times everything has looked perfect (and with higher odds) and we haven't had success.
So, we wait. Again. Today is CD19.
As usual, I'm so looking forward to the weekend. Some friends are taking us to the ballet on Friday night and we're going to do a bike ride on Saturday.
Showing posts with label Hope. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hope. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Thursday, January 21, 2010
A Fresh Perspective Goes A Long Way
Hello to ICLW folks...If you're new to my blog, "welcome and thanks for stopping by". I'm going to skip overview of me (you can see a little to the side or read my previous posts), and just go straight to what's on my mind...
This week I had an appointment with a new RE (I've been seeing my old RE for three years). I was really nervous about the appointment (i.e. worried getting sad or flustered), but I left with my spirits raised. She was very kind and knowledgeable. More importantly, she was decisive and optimistic. There is something about a "fresh start" that makes me feel more hopeful.
Overall, she says she is not that worried about my egg quality, whereas my old RE seems quite concerned. She thinks I'm young enough and my other test results look good. And, she reminded me that I have a 75-80% of carrying my next pregnancy to full term. The odds are still on my side if I can get pregnant again. I did it once in 2008, and once in 2009 ....
After reviewing my previous IVF cycles, she wants to do things a bit differently. She wants to do the transfer on day 3 rather than day 5. This is because we tend to have lots of top quality embryos on day 3 and only a few on day 5. She said some people's embryos don't do as well in the lab, and the lab is not as good as the body. I like this idea because it will probably mean there are more embies to freeze for FET, which is so much easier than a fresh cycle. She also wants to go a little easier on the stimulation and aim for 10-12 eggs rather than close to 20. She thinks by pushing as hard as we did on the ovaries/eggs, my eggs and body were not in peak form (this is my lame attempt at a much more scientific explanation).
I'm very willing to try this new IVF protocol. But, first, here's the kicker, she wants me to go back to Clomid + IUI for three cycles. It seems funny that in my fourth year of trying (I am a veteran people!), I'm back to "basics". But, I understand her rationale. After my natural pregnancy last summer, it shows my tubes, etc. work so IVF shouldn't necessarily be required. And, I only did one IUI (with follistim) before IVF. And, I only tried Clomid one cycle. But, I am skeptical of taking Clomid. The one time I took it, I ended up developing ovarian cysts that lasted for like 4 months. I never wanted to try it again because it delayed the process. And, my old RE always said we could skip it. But, I talked to her about this and she still wants to try. So, in the spirit of exhausting all our options, we'll give it another go.
So, we'll start a Clomid-IUI cycle in a month. In the meantime, I'm going to get a few more tests, but nothing too invasive.
Oh, and I'll just bury this in here, I'm not pregnant per HPT today. But, I was already moving on...
So, I look at the new plan on paper, and I see what is sure to be no fun at all. I see that I am sort of stepping backwards in terms of protocols and wonder how Clomid will work when the "big guns" have failed. I know that despite the new RE's optimism, this is not going to be easy. I remember how many times I've been disappointed and crushed throughout this process and how it's likely to continue. I know all this yet I feel hopeful. And, that counts for something, right?
This week I had an appointment with a new RE (I've been seeing my old RE for three years). I was really nervous about the appointment (i.e. worried getting sad or flustered), but I left with my spirits raised. She was very kind and knowledgeable. More importantly, she was decisive and optimistic. There is something about a "fresh start" that makes me feel more hopeful.
Overall, she says she is not that worried about my egg quality, whereas my old RE seems quite concerned. She thinks I'm young enough and my other test results look good. And, she reminded me that I have a 75-80% of carrying my next pregnancy to full term. The odds are still on my side if I can get pregnant again. I did it once in 2008, and once in 2009 ....
After reviewing my previous IVF cycles, she wants to do things a bit differently. She wants to do the transfer on day 3 rather than day 5. This is because we tend to have lots of top quality embryos on day 3 and only a few on day 5. She said some people's embryos don't do as well in the lab, and the lab is not as good as the body. I like this idea because it will probably mean there are more embies to freeze for FET, which is so much easier than a fresh cycle. She also wants to go a little easier on the stimulation and aim for 10-12 eggs rather than close to 20. She thinks by pushing as hard as we did on the ovaries/eggs, my eggs and body were not in peak form (this is my lame attempt at a much more scientific explanation).
I'm very willing to try this new IVF protocol. But, first, here's the kicker, she wants me to go back to Clomid + IUI for three cycles. It seems funny that in my fourth year of trying (I am a veteran people!), I'm back to "basics". But, I understand her rationale. After my natural pregnancy last summer, it shows my tubes, etc. work so IVF shouldn't necessarily be required. And, I only did one IUI (with follistim) before IVF. And, I only tried Clomid one cycle. But, I am skeptical of taking Clomid. The one time I took it, I ended up developing ovarian cysts that lasted for like 4 months. I never wanted to try it again because it delayed the process. And, my old RE always said we could skip it. But, I talked to her about this and she still wants to try. So, in the spirit of exhausting all our options, we'll give it another go.
So, we'll start a Clomid-IUI cycle in a month. In the meantime, I'm going to get a few more tests, but nothing too invasive.
Oh, and I'll just bury this in here, I'm not pregnant per HPT today. But, I was already moving on...
So, I look at the new plan on paper, and I see what is sure to be no fun at all. I see that I am sort of stepping backwards in terms of protocols and wonder how Clomid will work when the "big guns" have failed. I know that despite the new RE's optimism, this is not going to be easy. I remember how many times I've been disappointed and crushed throughout this process and how it's likely to continue. I know all this yet I feel hopeful. And, that counts for something, right?
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